{"type":"general","setup":"Why can’t you hear a pterodactyl go to the bathroom?","punchline":"The p is silent.","id":309}
{"slip": { "id": 121, "advice": "If you think your headphones are dying, check the socket for fluff with a straightened paperclip."}}
{"type":"general","setup":"Did you hear about the cow who jumped over the barbed wire fence?","punchline":"It was udder destruction.","id":87}
{"fact":"The cat appears to be the only domestic companion animal not mentioned in the Bible.","length":84}
["Neutra keffiyeh godard kogi typewriter put a bird on it fam distillery tousled mustache master cleanse lumbersexual humblebrag. Occupy jawn stumptown heirloom. 3 wolf moon marxism meditation gatekeep copper mug banjo. Pinterest cupping williamsburg schlitz.","Kombucha cornhole glossier retro church-key normcore 3 wolf moon polaroid. Mustache street art mukbang, shaman artisan flannel authentic thundercats portland pok pok kogi banjo before they sold out. Locavore stumptown health goth, adaptogen vaporware tote bag pinterest. Health goth chia blog 3 wolf moon la croix grailed.","Vinyl narwhal bushwick copper mug, ascot biodiesel leggings actually hoodie enamel pin pop-up blog tumeric gastropub literally. Direct trade kickstarter ramps jianbing. Yes plz unicorn keytar, sustainable kitsch jean shorts pour-over locavore man braid tumblr dreamcatcher stumptown listicle cardigan activated charcoal. Vinyl hot chicken tilde, DIY forage enamel pin chambray authentic mustache quinoa plaid pinterest gastropub brunch.","Bespoke cloud bread tofu everyday carry, hell of wayfarers Brooklyn gluten-free salvia sustainable. Chillwave cardigan chambray fingerstache twee man bun actually kale chips cronut seitan activated charcoal vape. Tote bag taiyaki art party plaid banh mi food truck semiotics letterpress irony bitters polaroid intelligentsia ramps. Sriracha cold-pressed selvage ethical mukbang taxidermy succulents, roof party fixie williamsburg semiotics.","Tousled synth palo santo grailed kogi celiac deep v messenger bag bitters vexillologist ascot. Four loko kombucha chartreuse, microdosing tilde YOLO bodega boys locavore neutra deep v you probably haven't heard of them occupy organic marxism. YOLO raclette grailed street art kombucha DSA hexagon blackbird spyplane beard cold-pressed irony tilde. Scenester lyft succulents prism. Trust fund JOMO echo park tonx, locavore salvia quinoa lumbersexual dreamcatcher. Marxism williamsburg wolf readymade seitan cornhole 8-bit big mood ugh Brooklyn hot chicken jawn. Messenger bag tbh squid blog."]
{"fact":"A cat can jump up to five times its own height in a single bound.","length":65}
["Paleo sustainable intelligentsia, kitsch ramps brunch cornhole meh etsy echo park pork belly farm-to-table listicle. Austin iceland solarpunk organic. Portland vexillologist humblebrag quinoa, af cred gentrify cardigan echo park subway tile poke. XOXO vice cred slow-carb jawn shoreditch air plant bitters mixtape flannel.","Lyft try-hard chambray normcore kickstarter raclette tbh echo park meggings skateboard irony green juice vape plaid. Lomo la croix yr XOXO cray migas bodega boys tilde hoodie cornhole activated charcoal mustache kombucha tonx. Schlitz distillery same chia, kitsch hella you probably haven't heard of them tattooed microdosing mixtape mumblecore gentrify ugh taiyaki sustainable. Cold-pressed deep v readymade fam. Chartreuse seitan lo-fi fashion axe. 90's fanny pack narwhal normcore iceland scenester farm-to-table vinyl vexillologist banh mi. Prism aesthetic salvia, lomo snackwave kitsch cliche.","Fingerstache bespoke ascot 3 wolf moon, next level wayfarers brunch retro lomo hell of grailed readymade vegan tumeric cupping. Butcher blackbird spyplane cardigan humblebrag. Blackbird spyplane hammock banh mi, mixtape vexillologist schlitz tonx plaid. Tofu literally tote bag YOLO. Echo park single-origin coffee meggings activated charcoal. Migas chillwave you probably haven't heard of them, keytar wayfarers adaptogen sustainable pabst poutine pug wolf lomo vice. Microdosing asymmetrical fashion axe twee, brunch schlitz roof party pug distillery stumptown flexitarian hashtag waistcoat.","Hot chicken literally coloring book deep v, edison bulb shoreditch yr taxidermy cloud bread praxis kinfolk portland. Flexitarian vaporware pork belly kombucha grailed put a bird on it same. Before they sold out air plant sustainable gochujang put a bird on it photo booth church-key. Chia kitsch blog bitters ramps sus jianbing man bun skateboard lo-fi fit pug biodiesel. Everyday carry meggings heirloom venmo, unicorn kinfolk hot chicken celiac readymade yes plz cold-pressed waistcoat bodega boys cornhole.","Mlkshk tilde try-hard food truck jean shorts, small batch fit. Scenester heirloom plaid unicorn yes plz schlitz, green juice biodiesel asymmetrical snackwave. Franzen ramps big mood mixtape. Edison bulb vinyl mlkshk paleo biodiesel deep v, schlitz authentic vape butcher fingerstache praxis 90's put a bird on it farm-to-table. Messenger bag pop-up fixie brunch selfies slow-carb."]
{"fact":"The cat who holds the record for the longest non-fatal fall is Andy. He fell from the 16th floor of an apartment building (about 200 ft\/.06 km) and survived.","length":157}
{"type":"standard","title":"Halocaridina","displaytitle":"Halocaridina","namespace":{"id":0,"text":""},"wikibase_item":"Q1242464","titles":{"canonical":"Halocaridina","normalized":"Halocaridina","display":"Halocaridina"},"pageid":26105102,"thumbnail":{"source":"https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/8/8a/Halocaridina_rubra-Opae_ula.jpg/330px-Halocaridina_rubra-Opae_ula.jpg","width":320,"height":206},"originalimage":{"source":"https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/8/8a/Halocaridina_rubra-Opae_ula.jpg","width":831,"height":534},"lang":"en","dir":"ltr","revision":"1281245443","tid":"1439a486-0484-11f0-9038-7fcb9438100b","timestamp":"2025-03-19T05:36:17Z","description":"Genus of crustaceans","description_source":"local","content_urls":{"desktop":{"page":"https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Halocaridina","revisions":"https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Halocaridina?action=history","edit":"https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Halocaridina?action=edit","talk":"https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Talk:Halocaridina"},"mobile":{"page":"https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Halocaridina","revisions":"https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Special:History/Halocaridina","edit":"https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Halocaridina?action=edit","talk":"https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Talk:Halocaridina"}},"extract":"Halocaridina is a genus of atyid shrimp. It contains two species – Halocaridina rubra and Halocaridina palahemo – both endemic to Hawaii. H. rubra is widely kept in aquaria.","extract_html":"
Halocaridina is a genus of atyid shrimp. It contains two species – Halocaridina rubra and Halocaridina palahemo – both endemic to Hawaii. H. rubra is widely kept in aquaria.
"}{"type":"standard","title":"Keta Municipal District","displaytitle":"Keta Municipal District","namespace":{"id":0,"text":""},"wikibase_item":"Q1432726","titles":{"canonical":"Keta_Municipal_District","normalized":"Keta Municipal District","display":"Keta Municipal District"},"pageid":45419736,"thumbnail":{"source":"https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/9/9b/Districts_of_the_Volta_Region_%282018%29.png/330px-Districts_of_the_Volta_Region_%282018%29.png","width":320,"height":384},"originalimage":{"source":"https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/9/9b/Districts_of_the_Volta_Region_%282018%29.png","width":2172,"height":2607},"lang":"en","dir":"ltr","revision":"1262692001","tid":"8367ad84-b8b4-11ef-b877-38709429f3f9","timestamp":"2024-12-12T18:11:31Z","description":"Municipal District in Volta Region, Ghana","description_source":"local","coordinates":{"lat":5.9031,"lon":0.9868},"content_urls":{"desktop":{"page":"https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Keta_Municipal_District","revisions":"https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Keta_Municipal_District?action=history","edit":"https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Keta_Municipal_District?action=edit","talk":"https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Talk:Keta_Municipal_District"},"mobile":{"page":"https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Keta_Municipal_District","revisions":"https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Special:History/Keta_Municipal_District","edit":"https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Keta_Municipal_District?action=edit","talk":"https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Talk:Keta_Municipal_District"}},"extract":"Keta Municipal District is one of the eighteen districts in Volta Region, Ghana. Originally created as an ordinary district assembly in 1988 when it was known as Keta District, which was created from the former Anlo District Council, until it was elevated to mun